


Idina Menzel One-Shots

by Lindsay (WillowLindsayFics)



Category: Broadway RPF, If/Then RPF, Real Person Fiction, Wicked RPF, idina menzel - Fandom
Genre: Accepting Request, Multi, fanzel, taking requests
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-12-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:41:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26272036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WillowLindsayFics/pseuds/Lindsay
Summary: Chenzel, Jadina, Lohrzel, Tayedina, just Idina. A collection of Idina Menzel one-shots, open to requests. Will be doing prompts and AUs as well, please suggest some if you find an interesting one.Mature just in case, each chapter will have their TW at the beginning if applicable.
Relationships: Aaron Lohr/Idina Menzel, Idina Menzel/James Snyder, Kristen Bell/Idina Menzel, Kristin Chenoweth/Idina Menzel, Taye Diggs/Idina Menzel
Comments: 13
Kudos: 9





	1. First Time (Lohrzel)

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: All smut. Never written smut before. Willow might be mad lol.

I stood in front of the mirror, looking myself over. I was in black form-fitting lingerie with a zipper down the front. It was practically a lace swimsuit. My eyes trailed my less than perfect curves, the way my boobs sagged a bit, the wrinkles on my face that my light makeup was not hiding.

Aaron was in the next room. I loved him. I have loved him for a while. But would he love me once he sees all of me? Once he sees the stretch marks that are the reason I stopped wearing low cut jeans and crop tops. Once he sees the marks of my age and finally understands that I do not want another child and even if I did, I would not be able to give it to him. I will start menopause soon.

But he is out there now, and he has been telling me he wants me.

I applied the bold red lipstick that makes my hair look darker and my skin paler.

I want this. I have not done this in years. I want to be loved, to make love. At least, I think I do. I feel ready for this I know he wants it. And I want him.

I took a deep breath. _You have got this Idina. You are hot, everyone would kill for a chance to be with you._

I step out the door.

"Id-" he was cut off when by my presence. His face goes slack, and his jaw hung askew and he eyed me up and down, up, and down, then finally his gaze rested on my face, our eyes meeting. I smiled.

His gaze resting on my _face_. Not my boobs or my ass. My face. 

He closed the gap between us, cupping my face and locking lips. "Dee," he moaned against my lips as he slipped his tongue into my mouth, sending electric shocks through my body. I sucked on his tongue, coaxing more moans from him as he pressed me up against the wall. He was already getting hard; I could feel it against my groin.

He trusted his hips against me, and I groaned, my legs starting to feel like jelly. I take control of the kiss and switch us around so that I am the one pressing him against the wall. I want him to enjoy this, I am going to make sure he enjoys this.

I start thrusting my hips against him as I taste his mouth with my tongue. He groans against me again, his hands moving to my thighs. I feel a warmth growing between my legs and we move towards the bed.

We fall down, him on top of me. He hovers over me, making me rise to meet his lips again, moaning my name as I kiss him. He deepened the kiss and pushed me down so that I was laying on the bed.

"God, Dee you're amazing," he told me between kisses, and he trailed them down my neck. His hands ran up and down my thighs, one slipping in between my legs.

"Ohh!" I exclaimed, turning my head to muffle my moans in the pillow as he started massaging my inner thigh.

"It's okay, Dee," he whispered in my ear, "talk to me, let me know you like what I'm doing. Let yourself go." He started to noble on my earlobe, undoing my earing with his tongue. He dropped it on the bedside table, then removed my second earing.

He trialled his kissed down my neck again, still doing things to my inner thigh, making me groan.

"Yes, talk to me," he encouraged as my moans got louder. His hand finally reached my center and paired with his kisses I let out a loud moan, calling out his name.

With his free hand, he slowly started to unzip my lingerie, kissing ever since of skin he revealed. He freed my right breast and grunted as he started kissing it. He nipped at my nipple and blew on it till it was hard. Then he started sucking on it.

"Oh god!" I moaned as he thrust his hand in tandem with his sucking. "Oh god oh god, Aaron!" He needed to undress me faster. Wearing this had been a bad idea, I should have come out naked. The want between my legs was getting stronger.

"Wet, are we?" he asked seductively as he rubbed circles on my clit. "I can feel it through the lace."

I nodded eagerly, breath heavy and irregular.

He smirked and went back to kissing my left breast while his free hand freed my right. Then he swapped, using his free hand to keep my left occupied.

When he was well and done, he started unzipping me more, training kisses down the valley between my breasts, down my stomach, across my abdomen. He kissed my stretch marks and called me beautiful.

Then he slipped the suit off me and coaxed my legs further apart. I held my breath as his lips descended on my inner thigh.

"Just fuck me already!" I nearly screamed as he got closer, still teasing.

He nibbled at the soft skin just beside where I wanted him, and I groaned. Then I felt his tongue on my sex, going in between my folds, but not entering me. I tried grinding against his face, anything to relieve the want in my loins. He kept kissing me, just above my entrance. Then, slowly, he inserted a finger.

"FUCK!" I screamed as he started circling it inside me and trusting. I was getting close, so close. "I'm coming baby," I muttered through ragged breaths, my hands in his thick black hair.

"Wait for me babe," he said as he inserted a second finger. "Wait, not yet," he said as he continued to thrust.

"I-I can-not" I whimpered incoherently as a third finger entered.

"You're doing so well, love," he said between kisses.

Then his fingers found the right spot and I screamed to the high heavens as he rubbed it. "Right there, babe, right there," I tell him. I cannot hold back much longer.

"Now, " he whispered. He curled his fingers against my spot, making my back arch and my hips buck as I tightened around his digits.

I convulsed uncontrollably and he continued to trust, keeping me going. I balled the sheets of the bed in my fists and let out the deepest, most unhinged moan I had ever loosed.

When it was almost over, I felt his tongue pressing between my fold, thrusting its was inside. He started moving it in the same way he'd done to remove my earrings and eating me out as he triggered a second orgasm, this one straining every muscle in my body as I started seeing stars.

I collapsed on the bed utterly exhausted, my limbs shaking. He crawled over me and started kissing me again, coaxing another moan, tasting like... what I assume would be me. His tongue trusts deeply down my throat and I feel the tip of him brush against my entrance.

I suck on his tongue and lower lip, my hands trailing down and guiding him inside. He trusted inside me as I fell apart beneath him, hips bucking and feet digging into his back, urging him on. His pace quickened and so did his kissing as he moved back to my neck.

A pain shot through my loins. It has been a while since I have done this. I must have cried out because he stopped.

"Am I hurting you?" he asked, his breath equally as ragged as mine. He pulled out.

"No," I said, "It's just been a while. Take it slow, babe, let me adjust, you are amazing." I placed my hands on his back and look into his eyes, begging him to continue. It felt so good. It had been years since I had felt anything like this.

He nodded and slowly re-entered. I shuttered at the feeling of him filling me. I started moving my hips as I got readjusted to the feeling and he followed suit. He started grinding against me, throwing everything he had into it and we both cried out for sheer pleasure. I could feel him hardening even more and I groaned as the sensation of him growing sent shock waves down the very core of my existence.

With a few more thrusts and a glassy look in his eyes I knew he was about to come. I felt him explode inside me, crying my name and making marks in my skin with his nails. He continued thrusting until I was on the same plane of existence and lost within myself.

"Yes!" I cried out as he rode out our orgasms. "Don't stop," I begged when I could get a coherent word out.

We collapsed breathless in a heap of sweat and limbs, his face resting on my chest and his fingers playing with a sill erect nipple as I heaved, trying to regular my breaths.

"Wow," he muttered after we had both wound down. "Holy fucking shit Dee that was the best sex I've ever had. Holy fucking shit."

I giggled. I could not help it. My cheeks were burning and aching form all the blushing and smiling as he drew patterns across my skin

"You're not so bad yourself," I said.

"Not so bad?" he asked. "I think that was three orgasms, missy. Not so bad..."

I giggled again. "Holy fucking shit, Aaron," I echoed, making him grin, in turn making me grin.

He rolled off me and brought me into a cuddle, still drawing patterns across my bare skin. "Has anyone ever told you that you are drop-dead gorgeous?" he asked as he traced my stretch marks. My warrior wounds form carrying my son Walker.

"Maybe," I teased. "No one's ever dropped dead yet."

He kissed the top of my head and I closed my eyes, resting my head on his chest, drawing my own patterns on him. "I love you," he said. "I fucking love you Idina Kim Menzel. And I love fucking you. Let us make this a regular occurrence."

I smiled. "I love fucking you too," I said. "I want to do it again, but not so soon." I was going to be sore as hell tomorrow. And I have a pretty good idea that sex might help cure it, at least a little bit. I grinned as I started to drift off to sleep with the calming sensation of him stroking and playing with my dark brown hair. "I love you," I muttered as I drifted off to sleep. "I haven't felt this wanted or beautiful in years. Thank you so much."

"Anytime, Munchkin," he said, kissing the top of my head. He pulled the blankets up around us.

He wrapped his arms back around me. I have not felt this safe either. God, I hope I marry this man someday.

"Yes," he said.

"Hmm?"

"You asked me to marry you," he said. "You're half asleep though."

"Oh, well, I want to marry you," I muttered.

"I want to marry you too," he replied.

I smiled. "Good." I kissed his lips. "Let's get married then," I said, finding my place again on his chest. "Fiancé," I add as I began to drift off again, a wide giddy smile on my lips.


	2. New Start (Lohrzel)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Requested by MarieneOliveira1 on Wattpad

Aaron had finally worn her down. They were going to have a baby. Not the traditional way, it was too risky now. But they were happy, stable, and the perfect family for a child. 

After months of paperwork, hours of training classes (why did they need them? Idina already had a ten-year-old, that was much more experience than some 30h crash course spread out throughout three months), they were finally ready. They did not have their hopes up for a baby. There were so many couples struggling with fertility issues who wanted a baby. Not to mention Idina was getting on in age. Having less than eighteen years might be nice.

She looked over her husband and squeezed his hand. They had three potential placements and were going to meet them today. The last time Aaron had looked this happy she had been escorted down the aisle by her father and son. They were both giddy. 

She squeezed his hand three times. It was their way of silently communicating. There was no quantitative measure, no three means _I love you_ , or four means _help_ , just a sense of knowing. Idina got seven in return. They were going to be a family.

Younger than Walker was all they were hoping for. He said he wanted a younger sibling, and they were hoping that while he was with them, he would be a good influence on them. If they went older, the child might end up being a bad influence on Walker. They had considered every aspect. 

The child did not have to look like them. Idina was willing and ready to deal with anything that might arise from that. She was still anxious about not being able to know their medical history in most cases, but she figured she had enough money to sort out whatever issues might arise.

She took a deep breath as their social worker came into the room. She sat down across for them and handed the couple three files.

"We have three children who we think will be a good match for your family," she began. She opened up the first one. "This is Lillah Grace," she said, showing them a photograph of a blonde-haired, blue-eyed little girl. "She had a speech impediment, but knows over five hundred signs and is very verbal when she's comfortable. She can write and communicate her wants. We have no records of the parents, but there's a chance her mother consumed alcohol while she was in utero."

Aaron picked up the file, and they skimmed it. She seemed sweet. But of course, she was. She was seven. Seven-year-olds were precious.

"The next is Merrik Annbre. She's nine and a half, no known physical or mental issues, however, she was abused in her previous home and has stranger and separation anxiety. She tends to gravitate towards her male guardians, so Idina, you might not see a strong connection initially if you choose her. She loves flowers. Her father is unknown, but her mother was killed in a car crash when she was three. We have a full familiar medical history on her mother's side."

They were handed the file of a brown-eyed brunette with the longest hair Idina had ever seen. There was a large hand-written note that said not to cut her hair. She was precious too. This was going to be so hard. They could either choose who they thought needed them more or meet them and see if they clicked. She could see in Aaron's eyes that he wanted to take them all in in a heartbeat if they could.

"The last child is Thomas LaFlamme," she informed them. "He's five, loves trucks. He has an issue with biting, both himself and others. His parents were teenagers when he was born and so far neither of them want any content, though there is always a chance it may change."

Idina's heart went out the little boy. But she knew right away that it would break Aaron if his parents came back and took him away. It could be a few weeks from now, or years, either way, it was not something she was willing to risk

"No," she said, shocking everyone. "I don't think we can deal with the possibility of the parents coming back," she said.

Aaron shot her a glance, but she stayed firm in her decision. They discussed it. Of course, Aaron wanted to do good, to help out, but they had to make these choices not before they got too attached. It seemed mean, but it would meaner to take on someone they could not care for in the way they needed. That was why they had ruled out most of the disabilities. That was why they were taking their time and not rushing it. The last thing they wanted was the adoption to fall through and get barred from this type of adoption again. Because this was their last chance.

"Are you ready to meet the girls?" the social worker asked.

"Yes," they both replied, grinning.

They were lead to another room with a bunch of toys and activities and told to wait there. Idina sat down on one of the small pre-school sized tables and started colouring to calm her nerves. Aaron rubbed her back, more for him than for her. He was very bad at it. 

A different social worker came in with the two girls. He was carrying Lillah, who was sucking her thumb. Merrik was hiding behind him. Idina and Aaron smiled form where they were on the floor.

Lillah started crying, startling Merrik who jumped behind the social worker. Someone else came and took her hand, leading her over to Idina and Aaron.

"Hi," Idina said with a smile. She got no response.

Merrik's gaze was fixated on Aaron.

"Hi," Aaron said. 

"Hi," she replied, looking down at her shoes.

"Do you like drawing?" he asked.

She nodded. 

"Dee's drawing flowers," he said. 

Merrik shook her head. 

"Want to draw flowers with me?"

She shook her head. 

Lillah had stopped crying and came over. She took the pink crayon out of Idina's hand, still sucking her thumb, and walked to the other side of the room where she started drawing on the wall. 

What were they supposed to do? If they split up, they would be fighting over which kid to take. If they didn't, how were they supposed to make this decision? Both girls had already rejected Idina, maybe it was better to let Aaron choose.

Merrik went over to Lillah, took the crayon back from the girl, and handed it to Aaron. Lillah instantly started shriek bawling, throwing herself on the floor. Her hands were forming signs, too quickly for Idina to understand.

"Sorry," Merrik said. "I thought she should give it back."

"It's not nice to take things to form people, even if they took it to begin with," Iidna said. 

"Oh," was all the girl said. "Are you going to be my new mommy and daddy?"

Lillah stopped crying as a social worker came over to help her. She walked over to Idina and Aaron and then proceeded to flip the table over. She shot Merrik a shit-eating grin.

"She did it," Lillah said, pointing her soggy thumb. Then she signed something quite nasty.

Idina was in absolute shock and Merrik quickly started saying it wasn't her.

"Merrik, we saw Lillah do it, it's okay," Aaron told the girl. She instantly hugged him.

"I want to go home with you!" she exclaimed, shocking them both.

What the fuck were they supposed to do? Lillah mimicked Merrik, jumping on Iidna and pulling the cutest face in the world. "Mommy," the little girl said, her blue eyes so crystal clear against the redress from crying. 

Idina froze, unsure how to proceed. 

"Mommy," the little girl said again, tugging on Idina's shirt. She signed _I love you._

"Why don't we all draw a picture?" Aaron suggested.

Lillah placed herself on Idina's lap, took back the pink crayon, and proceeded to scribble across all of her flowers. 

Idina looked over to Merrik, who had nervously picked up a red crayon and was drawing a rose with Aaron. 

Something bashed against her head.

"Me, mommy!" Lillah exclaimed, her hand signing something more. She hit Idina with the soft pencil case. 

This was going to be a long day. She hated herself, but she wasn't sure she could deal with the blonde. It was possible she was just making a ploy for attention and that Merrik was just as terribly misbehaved when she wasn't trying to look good, but right now she was leaning towards the nine-year-old. 

They did not have to make the decision today. They would get more visits, see who meshed well with their family. Who got along with Walker. That would be the most important.

It was a long day. By then end of it, she did not even bother trying to initiate sex. Or going up to the bedroom. She just crashed on the couch without changing.

* * *

Idina knew how they had to choose a few weeks in. They were beginning to dread their visit with Lillah. It was clear she had behavioural issues that no one had bothered to disclose. Walker didn't really like either of them. Merrik was too close to his age and had cooties, and Lillah hit him with his dinos and broke one. 

Luckily, Walker could spend time with his dad and get used to the idea. He had expressed many times, mostly to Taye, that he wanted a younger sibling. Probably a baby, not a sister near his own age. But Idina had already explained to him how this was going to work. He understood, even if he had his days when he did not like it. He also had his days when he did, like when they'd taken him and Merrik to Disney. Some woman had mistaken her for her daughter and touched her should and she had screamed. Walker had punched her in brotherly protectiveness. Luckily, no damage or lawsuits came from it.

Today was the gotcha day. They had Merrik's room all done and covered in floral wall decals, a closet with clothes she had chosen out and some they had brought as a surprise. Drawers instead of garbage bags to put her stuff in. A picture of the four of them at Disney on the bedside table. All the room needed was the girl. 

When the made it to the home, she was waiting for them on the steps and seemed relieved when they actually showed up. She hugged Aaron tightly. 

"I didn't think you'd come," she told him.

"we're always going to come for you," he replied. 

She started crying and Idina rubbed her back. She did not shy away.

Papers were filled out. Merrik took it home.

"I think I'm gonna like it here," she whispered once she was inside her room.

She was right. This was a new beginning, and they couldn't be happier.


	3. Comfort Food (Bellzel)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Requested by snowqies

Idina was not in the mood for another press day or prerelease party. Her divorce had just been finalized and her son was with Taye. Her mini fridge was almost empty and the last thing she wanted to do was go outside.

Curled up on the bed, she had no motivation to do anything. Her book was on the floor, her clothes balled up in the pathetic hotel hamper. The alcohol was tempting, but she couldn't get drunk and show up at work with a hangover. This movie was all she had now.

She opened up her phone and looked at a picture of Walker. Her parent's divorce had messed up her life, what was she doing to him? Did he even know what was happening, or was did he just know that she wasn't around anymore and had no idea why?

She texted Taye, asking if Walker was up and wanted to facetime. No reply. They were probably either asleep or out having fun. She missed her little boy. She missed bringing him into her bed, cuddling him and kissing his chubby little cheeks. She missed it when she and Taye went through their baby photos, betting on who he was going to look like and oh, look, he certainly has his grandfather's chin. She threw her phone against the mattress. 

Her phone buzzed. Groaning, she picked it up, just in case her son wanted to talk.

She had a text from her costar, Kristen.

_U up?_

Idina groaned, rolling onto her back. She liked the perky blonde, a lot. She clearly had a thing for short blonde costars called Kristin/en, but she just was not in the mood for someone who could run their mouth a mile a minute.

Her phone buzzed again. 

See? This was her point. Getting up and leaving her phone on the bed, she went back to her desk where she had the final(? hopefully) script for a play she was workshopping. _If/Then_. It had been written for her, her name would be the one on the marquee, she would be the one people were flocking to see and Iidna did not think she had what it took to carry this whole thing on her shoulders. 

Her phone started ringing. Walker? She ran over to the bed and answered it without checking the caller ID.

"Hey baby," she said instantly.

"Baby?"

Fuck, it was Kristen, she should have known.

"Oh, shit, I mean, crap, I mean the non-swear, fuck. Sorry," she mumbled. "I thought maybe you were Walker."

"Oh, is he supposed to be calling you now? If it's a bad time I'll call you later," Kristen said, her mouth running a mile a minute as she backpedalled faster than Idina's spin coach. 

"No," Idina said with a heavy sigh.

"Dee," came her caring voice from the other end of the line. "You good?"

"I'm fine," she snapped harder than she meant too. She did not want pity. "Sorry, for snapping. I'm not. And sorry for calling you baby, I know it's overstepping, I was just, I don't effing know. I just want my life to make sense again."

"Oh, Dee honey, it will," Kristen said. "Do you need a friend?" she asked, "a shoulder to cry on? I'm only a few floors below you, I could be here before you know it."

"I wouldn't want yo--"

"It's settled, I'm coming over. Just give me a bit."

"I thought you said--" _Click_.

Well, that was Kristen for you. Now Iidna had to wait here, alone, sad, and with the impending loom of her coming over. She had no idea what bugged her so much about the blonde, but there was something overly irritating in her cute and adorable mannerisms that Iidna could not stand being near her sometimes. To quote _Wicked_ it made her face flush and sent her head reeling, only it wasn't loathing. She didn't not like Kristen. They clicked, somewhat, but she certainly wasn't her best friend right now. Not for a lack of trying. They were so much like their characters in the movie. Kristen was trying so hard to have a connection and Idina just wasn't emotionally available right now.

She figured she should at least put on a presentable shirt. God, was she really going to talk to Walker in this stained shirt? He's getting old enough to point that sort of thing out.

After changing into a clean shirt, she laid down on the couch as it was closer to the door. She put on _116th_ by her _Wicked_ understudy Shoshana Bean. Life could always be worse. She was soon cycling through her pity party playlist, ranging from _116th_ to _Gasoline_.

At least she did not have to fight with Taye anymore. 

The doorbell rang maybe a half-hour later. It could have been half a century for all Idina cared.

She went and answered it, and of course, Kristen was there, grocery bags in her hands.

"We're having a girls' night in," the blonde informed her.

"Alright," Idina said as the blonde pushed passed her, ignoring the mess and setting up her things on the table.

"So, does this pour excuse for couch go out into the bed, or are we going to have to move to the bedroom to watch TV?" Kristen asked.

"Pardon?" Idina asked, drawn aback and blinking at her bluntness.

"I've got ice cream, whipped cream, cream cream, jelly bellies, beanboozelled, vodka, rum, schnapps, and beer, ain't sure if it's good though. Oh, and I brought some actual food too, and some cards and tissues and a USB full of pirated movies and basically everything we need to not move all night long and not fit in our dresses tomorrow."

"Okay." That was all she could think to say.

"So does this couch turn into a bed or am I going to have to risk whatever is going on in the bedroom?" Kristen asked.

"It's just a couch," Idina informed her.

"Damn," Kristen said. "I got a couch bed. Thought they'd give the Tony winner star of the show a better room than me."

"Mine is higher up," Idina pointed out, the tension slowly dissipating.

"Come in," Kristen joked. "I feel like I've kicked you out of your own room."

Idina chuckled, actually chuckled, not some forced thing she did for show, for the first time in a very long time. They moved everything Kristen had bought as well as the contents of Idina's mini-fridge, which was next to nothing, into her room, spilling it all out onto the bed. Kristen had even brought one of those ultra-soft and fluffy Walmart print blankets for them to cozy up underneath. She turned on the gas fire and powered on the TV before making Idina sit down and get cozy.

"Now, I have a tub of icecream of each of us so we don't have to dirty bowls," she blonde continued. "Häagen-Dazs, only the good stuff for my animated sister."

Idina smiled as Kristen handed her one of those wooden padelles people liked to call spoons and a larger than usual tub of cookie dough, dairy-free ice cream. When she'd finally wrestled the lid off, Kristen covered the top in whip cream, sprinkles, and candy without asking. 

"Now," the blonde said, cozying up next to her, "what _totally_ pirated movie does bad girl Idina Menzel want to watch today?" she said, batting her blue eyes.

Idina felt something stir in her gut. Fuck, she truly was a mess right now if someone giving her attention was this flattering.

"I don't mind," the brunette said as she took a bite. She got nothing but whipped cream and a gummy worm that almost fell on the blanket, but it was already making her feel a bit better.

"Aw, come on,"

"Kris," she said more firmly then she had intended, "I'm not in the mood to make choices tonight, okay? I appreciate what you're trying to do, I really do, but I can't right now. My whole life has just turned upside down and I don't know how the hell I'm supposed to deal with it or what the fuck I'm supposed to do. How am I supposed to be a mother all the way over here? How is Walker supposed to grow up with split parents? What's so wrong with me that we couldn't make this work?" She croaked out the last question, doing the last thing she wanted to do: She broke down in front of her co-star.

"Oh, Dina," Kristen said. "Dina, sweety, it's going to be okay. There's nothing wrong with you, you'll come through the other side a stronger and more confident person."

"How?" she asked, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. 

The blonde pulled her into a hug, which was awkward because they were awkward and not to mention there was that pesky hight difference... but somehow Idina settled, her head resting in the crook on her friend's shoulder as Kristen rubbed her back.

"Let it all out, it's a safe space here. No judgement, no questions."

Idina wasn't sure what came over her, but she spilled her gut out. Sobbing, snot dripping down her face, she went over every last painful detail from the separation to finding another woman in his bed, to divorcing, to finding Walker crying himself to sleep because he thought he was the reason mommy was mad at daddy and the reason why daddy wasn't coming back. 

Daddy wasn't ever coming back now.

"You're not the reason Walk, it's not you, you're never the problem you're the most amazing that has ever happened to me," she sobbed s she clung to the other woman in her bed. 

Slowly, afraid of pushing an unspoken boundary, Kirsten wrapped Idina in a hug as much as she could. She pressed her cheek against the top of Idina's head and squeezed, rubbing circles on her arms through her shirt. She couldn't believe Taye had been so stupid as to let someone as amazing, as talented, as inspiring, as kind, as, as... hot, as Idina Menzel go. 

"It's going to be okay," she whispered. "Here, have some ice cream," she said, offering the brunette a spoonful.

Idina opened her moth tentatively and Kristen spooned it in.

"Mm, good," Idina said, trying to regain composure as she nodded and swallowed the bite.

"Here's another." Kristen spooned another bite of ice cream into her mouth, making sure there was ample whipped cream included. 

Tears were still flowing down her friend's face, but she was no longer sobbing. Kristen rubbed her back and took as a good sign as she spoon-fed Idina the entire tub of icecream until the green-eyed woman was shivering. Then she wrapped her friend in more blankets and opened up the second tub of ice cream.

"That's, yours," Idina mumbled.

Kristen made a large spoon, ate half of it, then put the other half to Idina's lips. "You need it more," she said, "now eat up."

Idina did as she was told. They made it through the second tub, this time Kristen taking half the bite before offering it to Idina.

"Okay, I'm stuffed now," Idina said, no longer crying save for a few stray tears here and there.

Kristen did not say a word, not about how she'd been right or anything. 

"Will anyone ever love me again?" Idina lamented, starting to tear up and sniffle again. "I just, I can't..." she got sidetracked by a sob "I don't know what went wrong we were in love, we had Walker, we were supposed to be perfect and now it feels like I've done something wrong and messed it all up. Maybe I should have gone to therapy like he asked and tried to get over it. I had been neglecting him a bit with all this and the If/Then workshops."

"Dee, he cheated. it is not your fault. No, Dee, look me in the eyes, this. Is. Not. Your. Fault. Blame the cheater, not the victim. Blame his homewrecking slut. It's not you."

"But who will love me?" she whined, "My son isn't going to remember me when I get home."

"I'll love you," Kristen said. Then something hit her. She meant it. She would, no, she did love Idina. Her pulse began to quicken. This was wrong, the two of them in bed, Idina so venerable. They were colleagues.

"Really?" Idina asked, the hope in her voice intoxicating.

"Yes," Kristen said, knowing Idina would never understand how much she truly meant it at this moment. It felt like she had just admitted her deepest secret yet it was safe here in this room.

Idina wasn't sure what happened next, but she pressed a kiss against Kristen's lips.

"Shit, sorry," she said quickly, pulling away. She studied the blonde's face. It was shock, for sure. Disgust? Displeasure? Confusing? Idina's vision was still blurry. She'd just been cheated on and now she was making advances on a married woman. Fuck fuck fuckity-fuck fuck fuck.

Then something unexpected happened. The blonde kissed her back.

Idina pulled away again, the guild building deep in her gut. She had to end this now.

"We can't," she whispered. "You're married. I'm not going to be a homewrecker."

Kristen swore. "It hasn't been going that well either," Kristen said. "Truthfully I wanted this pick me up a bit to remind me that my life could be a lot worse."

"What do we do now?" Idina asked. Kristen had been calling the shots up until now, it seemed only fair she finish this.

"Why did you kiss me?"

"I'm not sure," Idina admitted. "Curiosity, loneliness."

"Love?" Kristen asked, hope in her voice.

"Love," Idina confirmed. She'd always felt it, she just never knew how to place it until this moment.

"Love," Kristen said with a small smile.

"So where do we go now?" Idina asked.

"I'm not sure," Kristen admitted. "But we'll figure it out."

Idina nodded. "We'll figure things out."

They sat there cuddling for a while in silence until Idina broke it.

"Tonight, can we just be two friends cuddling?" she said. "And tomorrow we'll figure all this shit out. I still need a friend right now. If you leave me now I'll have no one. But I don't want you cheating on Dax."

"Friends," Kristen said. "Until I leave, then we figure this shit out,"

"Yes," Idina sighed, leaning into her friend. 

Kristen ran her hands through Idina's hair as her friend fell asleep. She could get used to this. But tonight, they were friends, tomorrow, they would figure this out. Then who knew?


	4. Pre-Christmas (Chenzel + Walker)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> n/a: requested by Willow <3, I have no idea for a title, please suggest one!
> 
> I have no idea where I was going with this but current holiday Chenzel and poorly executed short/tall, here you go. This is fluff. I am still taking requests and ignore all the stuff you see willow post do not let it discourage you it is random stuff that I do not even know how to write. Be specific if you want, I like specifics, not Willow's Jadina, but superheroes.

Idina ran around her New York apartment, searching for her mask. Laundry? Nope. Key rack? Nope.

“Kristen!” she called out. “Have you seen my bloody mask?”

“Did you leave it in the laundry hamper?” she called out from the piano where she was working on some new sheet music for her new album.

“Yes!” she replied, running down the hallway back to their bedroom. “I’m meeting Walker at the airport; remember he comes here for the next few months.”

“I know Idina,” Kristen called back, still playing. “Calm down. You can wear one of mine.”

“I don’t fit in those child-sized ones,” she reminded her.

“Well, I don’t know where your mask is Dee.”

“Can you help me look?”

“Fine.” Kristin threw all her weight into scooting the bench across the floor. It did not move half as much as she wanted it to. Very unsatisfying.

Kristin started sweeping the apartment, looking anywhere masks should not be. Knowing Idina, it was rapped in bra somewhere bras shouldn’t be either. Not that Kristin had any objection to finding her lover’s bras in surprising places. She needed some spontaneity in her life right now.

She decided to check the laundry hamper. Aha! It was mixed in with Idina’s socks.

“I found it, honey!” Kristin sang.

Idina came barreling in seconds later. “Thanks, Krissy,” she said, leaving a sloppy kiss on her wife’s lips.

“Dee,” Kristin said as her wife brought the tornado to the door.

“Yes?” Idina huffed. “I love you, baby, but I’d use you as a meat shield to keep Walker safe and I don’t want him to be alone in the airport. This is his first time spending the holidays with us and I don’t want to give Taye a reason to renegotiate custody.”

“I know,” the blonde replied. “But you’ve got some panties sticking out of the rips and Walker’s old enough to notice and be embraced.”

“SHIT!” Idina yelled.

Thunderpup started barking and Kristin chuckled. Her wife was the hottest mess she had ever met. She pulled the panties out a smirked when she saw them. It was her favourite red lace that was drop-dead stunning against Idina’s hair.

“Go,” Kristin teased. “we’ll be waiting,” she informed her love, picking on the dog and waving his hand.

“I love you,” Idina said as she pulled on her jacket and tuque. She blew Kristin a kiss before running out the door.

The elevator was on the bottom floor, so she opted to run down that stairs. All of them. She needed to keep her cardio up anyway.

Checking her watch every few minutes, Idina ran to a taxi infested street and pulled one over.

“Airport,” she gasped as she got in. “LAX,” she specified. “And if you could wait, that would be amazing. I’m picking my son up so it should be quick “

“Will do,” the driver said.

She couldn’t see his smile, but his eyes were squinting so he probably was. She buckled herself in, breathing heavily. She was covered head to toe and Kristin had a very good system for disposing of gloves, coats, and other outdoor apparel and washing it.

She couldn’t wait for Walker to wake her up in the morning. She wanted to see his smile in person and measure on the doorframe his growth as they’d done for Thunderpup. She wanted to cuddle him and Kristin and watch corner movies and have him complaining in the background whole she video called in for Christmas parades. Maybe she would let him play the drums in the background.

With Taye’s permission, they had dropped a few grands on Walker's dream drum set. It was hiding in a storage closet for her partner's shopping sprees in hopes Walker would not see it. They had a plan to just give him the sticks under the tree and do a scavenger hunt for the rest across the penthouse to get Walker used to its set-up and all the rooms.

He of course had chosen out the colours for his walls and the décor. All basketball and blue and people cooler than mommy. Then Idina had hired an interior designer to make it the perfect room ever. Walker said he’d bring some stuff that would stay there all year long. There was even a bunk bed so that if he ever came to New York with a friend he could stay over instead of having to stay in the school purchased hotel rooms. Idina prayed he would enjoy these next few months. His friends were not here, but he could not see the ones in California anyway. They had plans to include the family in the penthouse beside them in their bubble, who had twinned a few months older than Walker, a boy and girl called Francis and Juliette. So he wouldn’t be friendless.

Her phone buzzed. Taye.

_There yet?_

_OMW_ , she wrote back. Walker's flight would have just landed. He still had to go through security and everything else. It would be at least another half hour.

_Thanks for taking him. He is very excited. I hope he gets on with Kristin. I know we never got along but she seems very good with him._

Idina smiled and texted back: _I’ve told Kris she’s gone if Walker decides so. Idk how serious I am though. I really love her. How’s your gf?_

_She dumped me._

_When? How are you? Should I kick her ass?_

_Yesterday, by text. I’m coping. I’m glad Walker’s out, I’ve been having some me time and focusing on myself. Thanks for the offer but I’m good. I’ll let you know when someone breaks Walk's heart then we can whoop their ass together._

_I think he’ll be the Heartbreaker with your chin. I’m almost there, we’ll call you when we’re in the cab back._

_K_

She sighed and looked out the window. It would be so much easier if Taye had someone. She wanted him to be happy. Not to mention, of both she and Taye, were in good relationships Walker would have good examples to follow. They were doing their best from opposite sides of the country, but it was hard. And she missed him sometimes. She just missed all those years it was good, those moment with Walker they could never get back.

The driver said something.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t catch that.”

“What terminal ma’am?”

“Oh, local flights. He’s coming from California.”

“School?” the driver asked as he changed lanes.

“No, he was with his dad, but I have him for the holidays and a few months.”

“That must be nice,” he said as he pulled over.

Idina gave him the money and promised him extra if he waited. She pulled out her phone and texted Walker to make sure he knew she was here. He texted back saying he was through security and sent her a picture of some Christmas ornaments.

_Dad said I should et Kristin a gift but j don’t know what she likes._

_The dog. It looks like TP. You’re going to love TP!_ She replied instantly, her heart-melting.

A few minutes later she saw him coming down the hallway. He tried to round the glass corner and ran to her.

“Mommy!” he squealed in pure glee, running with open arms.

“Hi Walkie, awe, I missed you sooooo much!” she cooed in a baby voice, kissing him and lifting him.

“There’s no one here,” he told her. “I was in the line for like five minutes and there was almost no one on the plane. They let me sit in first class!”

“That is amazing, sweetheart. Mommy’s got a taxi waiting outside, so we have to hassle, but you can tell me all about it in the car.” She took her hand and some of his bags and led him outside. He’d grown, for sure. It was just his hat and his boots; he was taller than when she had dropped him off at the beginning of the summer.

She sighed in relief when the taxi was still there. She got Walker into the car. He talked the whole way him, his face overshadowed by his Spiderman mask. She was grinning ear to ear the whole ride home.

When they got there she gave Walker the spare building card so he could go warm up while she paid the driver, giving him a Christmas tip. The one good thing about masks a winter gear meant no one would recognize her from far away. Even up close it was hard if they weren’t looking. Though she did miss jeans and flip-flops. That had been one of the perks of California. But Kristin had hit it big on Broadway, bigger than Wicked they were thinking, and it had been too good of an opportunity to pass up. She was working on an album and aiming to do another tour sometime.

She oiled Walker’s bags out of the trunk. God, it was heavy. What did he have crammed in there? She would have to look out for extra weight fees on her debit card.

Idina hauled the bag into the lobby where Walker was waiting patiently for her. As soon as she stepped through the revolving door he started talking her ear off about his basketball games and what he did with his aunts and how headed that his dad is sad but he really, really hated daddy’s girlfriend and he was glad she was gone.

They went up to the top floor and when they got through the door Kristin had filled the apartment with the sweet smell of gingerbread. Greeted by a fanatic Thunderpup, Walker and Idina had to think fast to not let the puppy escape. Once inside, Idina again reminded Walker of how he was supposed to remove his clothes, spray his bags, and wash his hands for at least thirty seconds.

“I _know_ mom,” he huffed as he did them under her watchful eye.

Idina might be a slob, but she took Walker’s health seriously.

When he was deemed clean by his mom and Kristi he was allowed inside the penthouse. They gave him a tour, and holy cow there was a gym! His face lit up. They might not have a yard but penthouses had some perks. And they did, technically, have green space on the roof, only they were letting the whole apartment use it at prebooked times to everyone got some fresh air. And that was only the roof roof. There was a balcony that was more like a plate and Idina instantly wanted to make the glass barrier four times higher when she saw they only came to Walker’s chin and if he wanted to her could pull himself up onto them.

He was a ball of energy by the time they made it to his room.

“Oh my God mom!” he exclaimed when he sawing. “It’s so lit! I can’t wait to start a gaming channel I’m going to get so many subs with this setup.”

“Whoa there park your horses,” Idina said. “What’s this about a gaming channel?”

“You and dad are on like the prefight of a fight and whenever you fight k get whatever I want,” he replied.

“You are not getting a gaming channel and Taye and I are not on the brink of an argument.”

“You will be when you hear what he said to me,” Walker replied.

Idina softened. “What happened?” she said, sitting down on the bedspread and pulling Walker into her lap.

“Dad said it is my fault his girlfriend left because I called her a gold digger and white trash and now, he’s really mad at me.”

“She is white trash,” Idina huffed. “But your dad loved her, a lot.”

“Not as much as he loved you or Kris loves you.”

Idina pulled him close. “It’s going to be okay, I promise baby. You’re too young to legally have any social media anyway and u would be a bad parent to let you. However, you can always make a video for Krissy and me to watch. And we can send them to grandma and grandpa and Aunt Cara.”

“That’s not the same thing,” he huffed.

“Come on, let’s help Kristin with the gingerbread,” Idina said. “We can unpack later. Unpacking is work.”

“I love you,” he replied, smiling and standing up.

She made Walker lead her back to the kitchen. He only got lost twice. He’d get the hang of it soon. It was an odd mix between open apartment concept and maze-like rooms for old, crooked houses. But she loved it. They were still debating about installing a pool on the outside terrace. Not a large one, just one of those with jets that you swim against. Walker would not find that much fun though and the thought of Kristin naked in a hot tub was appealing. They’d sort it out next summer. Right not the snow made it practically unusable with all the salting and the shovelling.

Walker's first night was great. They baked and backed a baked and because his room was less than ready by the time an old grandfather clock Kirsten had inherited from a relative chimed midnight, he cuddled up with them in their bed. Idina smiled across his sleeping form to her lover who was staring at her son I absolute amazement.

“Does this mean he accepts me?” she whispered.

Idina nodded, making the blonde’s smile grow. “Yes, it does,” she said as she ran her finger through his hair. This was the start of their new lives. She’d have to let Kristin know which oils and gels worked best in it so that she could help him when Idina was out. “He said Taye’s mad at him, but I don’t think there’s much I can do about that. I think it would help if you show him some extra interest. Let him know you didn’t just marry me, you also agreed to love him too.”

“Of course I will. Idina, you know very well id do anything for Walker, and not just because I’m scared, you’d send me to hell.”

Idi leaned over and planted a kiss on her lips. She curled up with her baby boy. He wasn’t a baby anymore, but still came to his momma when he was sad. She kissed his forehead. Today was the start of the best Christmas ever.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> n/a: Requested by Willow, and anon. Combined both requests because I’m lazy.
> 
> I enjoyed writing this I want to expand on superheroes in my personal writings anyway, so this was nice practice.
> 
> Warning: Some shut near the end. Lots of angst, or at least I tried to write lots of angst. Haven’t ventured there before so critique would be great.

James had to get back to the Richard Rodgers Theatre. His call time was in half an hour, but he was on the other side of the city, far away from Broadway. He had promised Jaqueline he would give up the vigilante stuff and get a normal job now that they had Ollie and another on the way, but he could not bring himself too. Every day he heard someone who needs help. Someone who needed _his_ help. He had to make the world a better place. Not for him, but for his kids. He was doing it one bad guy at a time.

It was not that he did like his job, just that he did not see what theatre could do. He met people all the time after the show who claimed it showed them all the possibilities but was it changing lives? Was it really comforting all those military wives or were they just saying that? He had no idea. But this, this is could see, smell, taste. With this, he knew was making a difference.

His alarm beeped. He had to leave now, or he would not make it. Theoretically, he could use his powers, but given what he’d already done today it wasn’t a good idea. Overuse negatively affected his health. The police were already here, but he was not sure they had it under control. If he did not make it to the theatre, Jaqueline would know. She would see the connection between the vigilante appearance and his callout, and it would be over.

His phone rang, it was Jac. _Why aren’t you in your dressing room?_

_Pic, now James or this is over._

_I am not emotional, I am serious. Stress is not good for the baby. Our baby. YOUR baby. Shit James do you want to be alive and see them grow up or not? If you do not want to, that is fine, but you must let me know so I can start planning and don’t you dare for a second think I am not going to ask for some form of child support. Either from you or your parents, whoever pays up._

He sighed. There was no way he was going to win this one. He put his phone in his pocket and turned it off. There was no point in making it back in time now.

His castmates would wonder where he was, but other than that, nothing much. James needed something, and he was not getting it there.

* * *

Ma’am Vocalle had shown up in NYC around the same time he did. There had been some news of her in DC around the time he had been doing _If/Then_ previews as well, but those were unfounded rumours. Idina had called out sick for the past two days. Walker had left and he had a feeling it had something to do with that. He had not seen Oliver since Jacqueline had served him with divorce papers. James had no energy to fight it. He found himself haphazardly floating through life. He went to the theatre, he beat up the bad guys, he went to sleep alone.

Idina was a light. Despite whatever she might be feeling inside, she was always a beacon. Her laugh, her positive outlook. And yet she admitted life could suck and this would be hard. He was rebounding and had started avoiding her, not wanting to pull her into his mess. She didn’t deserve it.

At least with her around, he could focus on mitigation and his job. Being a superhero didn’t pay the bills. Jackie was in today, but it wasn’t like performing against Idina. At least she would be in for the evening performance. He was more excited than he should be.

The show went well, but that was it. He skipped the cast door to go to the gym to pass the time. He was signed up at a boxing gym and he needed to work on his roundhouse. It was by the door. He was halfway through his set when he was Idina walk in.

His heart stopped. She was in black yoga pants with dark purple accents and nothing else but a matching sports bra. She was already sweating. He tried not to stare as she signed in and pulled out her boxing gloves. She started her set with the classic one-two punch, alternating with hooks every two minutes.

“James,” someone exclaimed. “You’re hogging the roundhouse mate.”

“Oh, sorry “ he mumbled. He moved to the knee jabs., then the front-facing kick, alternating sides and angles. His back kick was bad. As he moved to the groundwork he got another good look at Idina as she switched to the roundhouse her form was immaculate. There was something similar about her form. He’d seen it before, even if he had not seen her at the gym.

Suddenly, Idina checked her phone and ran off. It was like she had never even been here leaving a gap in the area she had once been working out in.

James checked his. He still had time before he had to be at the Richard Rodgers, so he wasn’t sure where she was rushing off to.

 _Don’t think about it, she owes you nothing,_ he told himself as he finished up his sets. He was stretching when he saw on the news that Ma'am Vocalle was at it again in her teal and white spandex. She looked a bit like something out of a cartoon, unlike James, the Shadow, who struck to alone incognito look.

He wondered who she was. She never spoke. Whenever she did, it was to yell at theirs and knock them down with her voice.

He wondered if she could ever speak normally. And how she got that way. For James, he had been travelling in college, chasing a dream when he got caught in a mugging. He was the only one of his friends to make it out, and he wasn’t the same since. It had been a day around a decade ago. Anyone who had been in a life or death situation came out different if they came out at all. No one knew why. Most people weren’t keen on being guinea pigs to try and find out. All anyone knew was super crimes started happening, and people like James and Ma'am Vocalle stepped up to stop them.

He got some food and called his lawyer. He went over his paperwork until he had to go back. He could slow down time but he couldn’t speed it up. Not to mention the only slowed time around him. He was shaving off years of his life every time he did. Maybe he could slow it down so much and live out his life and in the span of a footstep, people would watch him grow old and die. He wanted to die. There was no point to anything now.

When he got to the theatre, he walked past Idina’s room. He could hear her talking, going on about the show and how much it meant. How much its message meant. How important everyone was and every choice made. Idina believed in this show more than anyone James had ever met and she was the sole reason he was still here. She made him believe in it too.

Not to mention the kissing was pretty good.

Putting a smile on his face, James opened the door without knocking. He froze. Idina was half-naked, phone between her shoulder and cheek, changing out of a teal and white spandex suit.

Holy shit.

Idina froze when she saw him. Her phone dropped.

Fuck.

No k e was supposed to know. She didn’t even care that she was in nothing but her underwear. She just stared at him until her senses came back and she told him coldly to shut the door.

He did so, in just as much shock. Then, he raised his arm and pointed to a band. Idina squinted, trying to make out what it was. Then she saw the familiar gray waves of the Shadow's time vortex.

Holy fucking shit.

Holy fucking shit!

Her heart started racing. She had yet to find her words. James placed a silencing finger to his lips as the vortex surrounded them and soon they were in a shadowy world where time barely passed. Her prone screen was glitching, unable to function and be in this reality at the same time.

“So you’re the Shadow?” Idina said, straightening up. She oiled her spandex off her ankle then held it across her chest

“And you’re Ma'am Vocalle,” he noted.

She nodded. She motioned for him to sit down on the couch. They talked for what seemed like hours but according to the clock on her wall, it had only been two minutes. She pulled one of Taye’s old shirts on to cover herself but didn’t bother with anything else. He was divorced and honestly if was focused on checking her out, James wouldn’t notice that she was checking him out. And James Snyder was a fine view. A very fine view indeed. Not that she hadn’t noticed before... just…fuck. He was hot. And recently single. And hot. And ripped.

She cleared her head and looked back at his face. He was telling her about how he became the way he was. Then, because she felt like she had to, she told him. She and Taye had been fighting. Taye had been drunker than a skunk. He threw something at her and it shattered. She started screaming. He hit her. She screamed again., only making his escalate until her scream sent him flying against the wall.

“It's why I do it,” she mumbled looking forlorn. “Every time I use my power I remember why I can’t g back to Taye. I had lacerations in my eye, broken fingers, a shattered nose. Bruising. I didn’t realize I had powers until he got drunk after Walk was born and I lost my shit when he raised his voice at Walk because he wouldn’t stop crying. I lost it…” she trailed off.

James pulled her into a hug and kissed her forehead. “We’ve got time,” he replied pulling her as close as she’d let him.

Idina paused for a moment, processing the fact that James was touching her. Then she brought her legs closer and curled up against him. It was nice talking to someone who knew what it was like.

“You’re going to be exhausted if you keep this up too much longer,” Idina reminded them. The price for their power was the energy it would take to do what they did. For Idina, a few minutes of yelling was like a full show, just without the vocal issues. James had told her once, like Shadow, that he used up the energy he would have needed to live the times over and over again or something like that. The more of a workout he had while in the vortex the more he crashed.

“This isn’t that tiring,” he replied. “I could think of something that would knock me out cold though.”

She smirked and hugged him. “I’m glad it is you,” she said after a minute. “I felt so alone. Then Shadow popped up. Walk was so amazed and I thought maybe he’d like me more if I was a cool superhero too, but then I realized I could never tell him. And he thinks Vocalle is pathetic anyway. I’m surprised Taye hasn’t put the pieces together.”

“Jac couldn’t handle the worry.”

“She’s pregnant. I’ve been pregnant before. It sucks. The human race needs to be thankful babies are so cute because if they weren’t it is not worth it. Not that you’re kids aren’t worth it, just being present, I mean…” she sighed. She couldn’t have it.

“It's okay,” he said. “I get it.”

“How much time do we have?”

“I’m not sure,” he admitted. He did play around with it too much outside of crime-fighting. Jacqueline was not a fan. “Are you good?” he asked. “We should be getting back, but if you need some it’s fine.”

Idina curled up against him. “This is not,” she said. I don’t think I’ve ever met someone who just gets it as you do.”

“Well, you haven’t met me before,” he joked with a smirk.

She chuckled, hugging him. James took a risk and hugged her back. She sighed, closing her eyes.

“I don’t want you crashing before the show even starts,” Idina said after a moment. “We should get ready. Do you want to come over to my place tonight? I know how to get over a divorce or at the very least act like you’re over it. I want to talk more. I’ve never met anyone else like me. Turns out not as many people as you think to survive a near-death experience in a day.”

“If that’s what you want to do,” James said, “we can do it.”

* * *

The next few weeks were bliss. The two of them were arranging and organizing, covering different incidences. It means they got some downtime, but it also meant that the time they spent outside the theatre was apart.

Idina liked James, proper wanted to date like him. She liked Oliver too. She’d met him once and was helping James build his custody case. He had a good one. Better than she had with Taye. Jacqueline didn’t have a job. She was living with her parents. She was always postponing because she was pregnant and came up with a million excuses. They were not complete shit, but Idina’s pregnancy had been one of the worst her ob-gyn had ever seen so she was fairly sure she had a good grasp on what was reasonable and what was made up.

Tonight was one of the rare nights they were both free and they were cuddling on the couch watching a movie. She stared at his jawline, his lips. She was so close to them, she could just close the gap. Instead, she placed her head on his shoulder and sighed, turning her gaze back to the screen.

James was drawing slow circles on her upper arm. His head leaned against hers. She was aware of his every touch. But she doubted he felt the same.

Meanwhile, James was thinking the same thing about Idina. He doubted she saw him as anything more than she trusted best friend. He doubted she could. They were both broken and not in the right place to be in a relationship anyway. They were just keeping each other sane, cooking, working, planning together. Keeping each other in check. He was making sure she didn’t unravel and she was doing the same for him. He wasn’t going to risk Idina for anything. Having her here was more than he ever could have hoped and he was so happy.

He kissed her forehead and felt her squeeze his arm. She knew exactly how he wanted her to think he felt.

The urge to pull her into his lap was strong. He just wanted to hold her, more than he already was. She had another fight with Taye today. Apparently, Taye had been skimping his anger management and flopped at Walker. The kid was currently at his Nan's since Taye still had custody and didn’t want Idina getting extra time.

She was such a trooper. He was lined up to get majority custody of Oliver, and the new baby girl when she came all because of the amazing woman in his arms. The same woman who couldn’t keep her son.

He reached to the coffee table and ate some more grapes, offing some to Idina. Idina took one and placed it between her red painted lips before biting it in half and swallowing. He stared at her neck. Maybe he was wrong and he could not do this.

“Shots?” Idina asked.

“Yes,” he said. A drink would stop him from going mad. Body shots! His brain yelled.

Pulling out the tequila, James had a moment where he wondered if he should just grab the wine, but Idina had followed him into the kitchen. The television was still blaring the space movie neither of them had been watching for the past hour.

He grabbed the salt a lime as well and saw Idina smirk.

“So we are going to have a good night,” she chuckled.

“You weren’t liking Revenge of the something aliens?” he teased.

“Nope,” she replied. “I don’t think you were either.”

“What do you mean?” he asked, leaning back against the counter in a way he hoped looked more seductive than stupid.

Charmed, Idina smiled as she invited herself into the kitchen. She got some glasses out from the cupboard, deliberately giving him a good view of her butt. She wondered if this was a good idea. A drink or two would be fine, getting drunk could ruin their friendship.

That’s when she noticed they’d practically moved in with each other. They came in and out of each other’s apartment’s like it was nothing. She had half her clothes here and a half at her place. Same for James. Oliver had even slipped and called her mom and neither of them had corrected him.

They needed boundaries, not a drink. But James was pouring the toxic liquid into tiny shot glasses and doing that thing with his face that she couldn’t say no to. She wondered if he’d go for it if she stuck the salt on her neck. James was such a flirt, she certainly would.

Idina subscribed herself to the notion she would do it just to feel what it would be like.

They laid the salt out on the counter, with shot glasses down the line with the lime at the end. The person to finish first got to choose the next challenge.

Three, two, one and in flustered giggling they were showing each other out of the way, trying to get to the first shot glass. Five in and Idina had the lead she wanted. She liked the mountains of salt off the plates then had a wonderful idea. She stuck both limes in her mouth in the plain view of James, squeaking at the repugnant taste.

She cocked an eyebrow. Try my Snyder, it said. He did.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her, using his tongue to maneuver the lime out of Idina's mouth and into his own, making her moan as he did so. She felt his hands tighten around her tights she did. It was just her imagination.

But they didn’t part lips until Idina spit her lime slice out. James followed suit, then locked lips with her again.

Butterflies swarmed in her stomach as James Snyder kissed her. Passionately. He groaned.

Fuck, he wanted her! Idina’s hand rose to his hair, pulling herself up and closer. He lifted her and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He held her against himself as he continued to draw longing noises from her core. She could feel the longing growing between her thighs.

He gently placed her on the counter and pulled away for a minute, staring into her eyes. She could not hold his gaze.

“Are you okay with this?’ he asked his hand on her thigh.

She nodded.

“Are you sure?” he asked again.

Idina looked up at him. He wanted this too. It is was not just her. He wanted this. “yes,” she said, leaning in to kiss his lips again. She wanted all of him.

Slowly, he maneuvers them so that he was pressing her against a wall and suddenly all their parts were pressed up against each other. Idina couldn’t tell who was more desperate. 

“Oh, sweet Jesus,” she whimpered as he thrust his hips against her. “Oh God, oh dear God,” she moaned as a warmth spread through her body, tingling as it went making her legs feel like jelly.

James continued his torturous slow assault, each time trusting against her a hit harder.

“Fuck drop the pants,” she managed to get out. Then she started sucking on his neck.

He pulled them away from the wall. Idina looked up for a moment, confused. His lips met hers again and he started to stumble down the hallway. Idina wiggled free and stumbled along with him, falling backwards until she hit a door.

James opened it and scooped her up under the legs. She clung to him in pure ecstasy. He laid her down on the soft duvet as Jenny, kneeling by the bedside and caressing her face before he leaned in for another kiss.

Idina’s body pivoted towards him, her desperation growing. 

James was slow. He made her feel good. He let her take control, or at least feel like she had control. As they stripped down, they suddenly lost their feverish forever and became entranced with each other's bodies. Entranced with that made the other person feel good. It was all Idina could think about as she showed James exactly how to touch her.

With two fingers she guided his along her clit, whispering to him what to do. Taye had never listened in bed before. He believed he had been the sex God. Not that it had been bad it had been quite good. It only left her wanting. And James was fulfilling all those wants.

He moved so that he was on top of her and then he spread her legs. She lay naked before him in the cool autumn air that was blowing through an ajar window. He beat over to kiss her lips. Then he started trailing them south. Slowly. Asking her what felt good. Making it feel better than she ever could have imagined. When he reached her sex she was dripping. He fingers and rubbed her the ways she had shown him, sending her body into a never-ending wave of shakes and he teased her, not letting her come all the way. Keeping her on the edge.

His lips descended on her sex, sucking, locking, anything. Her whole body was taught and paralyzed as he teased her with his mouth. Her fingers gripped his dirty blonde hair, clawing at his scalp, telling him more, telling him to go harder and faster. Pleading with him for release.

James was not going to give it to her that easily.

He slipped a finger inside her and took a second to refocus. She felt so good and for a second he had nothing but the thought of sticking his dick inside. Idina contracted around his digit, begging him. He inserted a second finger. She moaned as he started sucking faster.

But he moved his fingers slowly. First, in a circle, until he found the right spot. Then he did the come here motion, one finger at a time, building it up slowly until he was speaking her g-spot it tandem with his kisses. Idina’s hips were bucking, moving side to side. He knew exactly where she was trying to get him. He was about ready to let her have it.

“Please,” she breathed. “Please James, please,” she whispered over and over again. “Oh baby, please.”

He smirked. He gave it to her.

She hit a new note as her entire body contracted, tightening around his fingers. He moved as quickly as he could, keeping her going until his hand was exhausted and he slowly let her wind down.

When she was laying flat on the bed, he pulled his finger out and licked them clean before kissing her one last time. Then he crawled Overton of her trembling form. She stared up at him wide-eyed, her face flushed, biting her lip, and locking eyes with him. She was ready for what was next.

James kissed her, his hips slowly descending. He trembled as Idina took his member and guided him inside. He trembled again as she gasped, a perfect seductive gasp.

He lowered himself in slowly, looking for any signs of discomfort. There were none. His lover’s head rolled back, moaning in pleasure as he entered. He wasn’t even in when her hips started gyrating against his uncontrollably, a firm hand on his back holding him there.

His hand went down to her clothes, rubbing it as he trusted, making her tremble and tighten around him in tandem with his motions. He threw his head back and groaned a deep throaty groan as Idina trusted against him, her softness enveloping his most delicate areas and caring for them tenderly.

He could feel himself getting close. Idina knew what she was doing. He just needed one more… she thrust against him again, pushing him closer but not quite there. And she kept doing that.

“D-dee…” he squawked, unable to get her name out.

She groaned in response. He rubbed her harder and she contracted involuntarily, sending him over the edge. Stars danced across his vision before he collapsed in a heap on her. He soon got up and kept going until she had met him on the same plane of bliss.

They spent the night exploring each other. Trying things out. Googling anything and everyone and seeing what worked. Before the night was through, they knew every inch, freckle, scar, and wrinkle on the other's body.

Grinning like an idiot, James lay down beside Idina, the both of them still trembling. She curled up in his arms, a large smile across her face. He had never met his match in bed before. Idina had matched him. She’d almost outlasted him, but he played dirty. He would pay for it at the gym tomorrow.

Brushing his hands through her chocolate-coloured hair he wondered why they had only met now.

“That was amazing,” he said. “You were so good Idina, honestly.”

She blushed and his her face on his chest. He could feel her burning cheeks against his bare skin. “You weren’t so bad yourself,” she giggled. She pulled her head back up and caressed his cheek with the back of her fingers. “I’m so glad we met. I am so glad it is not just me. I fucking glad you exist.” He smiled and kissed her hand. “Imagine a world where this never happened…” she started. He loved it when she talked. And she talked and talked, her soft voice warming his room. He wondered if this would soon become their room or if hers would be. Probably hers. He bet she had the more expensive mattress.

Smiling, James listened to her ramble on and on about what if and how important the show was. How much she loved it and how this was the worst time to be playing a divorcee yet at the same time it was helping her heal. He saw the meaning of snow, how the play could help people just as much as punching a villain. Idina could make him see it. And she wants even trying. She was just being herself.

There was a reality where they weren’t superheroes and weren’t divorced and there were ones where they met when James was fresh out of college and others where they never did at all. But they were stuck with this one and had to make the best of it. They could never know what if. They had to believe it would turn out the way it was meant to in the end. They had to move on, press forward, live life.

James was excited to begin living it with her.


	6. Something Special; or Comfort Food pt 2 (Bellzel)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> n/a Requested by snowqies

It was a few days before they got a chance to talk. Press was gruelling and whenever Idina wanted to pick up the phone when she got back to her hotel room she crashed on the couch before she could make it to her bedroom.

Taye was not helping. The mitigations meetings were on his schedule. He claimed since he was looking after Walker right now, he got the say. Idina did not have the energy to fight him on this and he knew it. They both loved walker, they really, truly did but it was so damn hard not to want all of him all the time and think about what would be better for him. Taye was moving on. His new girlfriend was talking about moving in. Idina wanted her nowhere near Walker until they met. Taye said he had it all under control and she was not there so she could not judge.

 _I bet the moment I bring another man home you are going to flip your shit,_ the thought as she read over their texts from earlier in the morning. _Or woman,_ she thought with a smirk. She needed to call Kristen. She was not being fair to the blonde who had just served Dax with divorce papers. At the very least they were going through the same thing, only Kristen did not have kids.

Idina could not keep her eyes open and the screen was blurry. She sighed and drifted off to sleep, stomach growling.

* * *

Idina woke up suddenly by her phone ringing. She had passed out on the kitchen table and nearly fell off the stool before she got her bearings. She picked up her ph9on that was hanging by the charger and answered it.

“Hey, Idina…” a shaky voice said.

“Kristen, hi,” Idina replied, the awkwardness growing. They had yet to talk this through.

“Is, is this an appropriate time?” she stuttered. “I want to talk, and -um,”

“Do you want to get come to coffee?” Idina asked. “I was a coffee shop on the corner just down the street. It’s got a lot of foliage inside and I think there are some booths away from the windows so we can have some privacy.”

“That sounds nice,” Kirsten said, perking up. “Are you okay Dee? Is it okay if I call you Dee? You just sound a bit off.”

“I had mitigation meetings with Taye. I got back…” she checked her watch, “like twenty minutes ago. You interrupted my power mom nap,” she chuckled. “And you can call me dee, I don’t mind,” she replied.

“Okay, can you meet me at the coffee shop in ten?”

“Aare you going to be there in ten or will I be hanging around waiting for you?” Idina joked.

“Half an hour,” Kristen replied after some consideration. “Just to be safe.”

“I’ll see you then,” Idina replied. She was smiling. She felt good. She needed to get out. This was good. Good.

She also knew it would take her a good twenty minutes to get off the couch. She wasn’t even sure where they were anymore, all she knew was they were stuck in some tiny European apartment midway through their worldwide press tour. Maybe she’d figure it out if she bothered to leave the world’s smallest apartment. There was barely standing room in between the couch and the bed, and the door barely cleared the bed and the coffee table. There was an espresso machine on top of a mini-fridge and nothing else but abstract art on the walls that made her think negative thoughts.

Should she brush her teeth? She wanted to make out with Kristen, really make out with her. No quick guilty pecks.

What Idina needed was a grip. She needed to figure out what she wanted and what she was doing because this woman was leaving her husband for her and Idina wasn’t even sure she wasn’t leading Kristen on with false hope.

This wasn’t going to work. She needed to put an end to it tonight before Kristen couldn’t go back. She still had time to tell Dax this was a mistake and she was tired and stressed and tell him that Idina had been manipulating her in her venerable state. They could still make marriage counselling work.

Idina dashed to the bathroom, or more accurately she jumped over the twin bed and landed on the door before she opened it just in time to puke in the sink. She finished, but she didn’t feel done.

Fuck, she thought. She was getting fat…

Stop.

Idina closed her eyes and took a deep breath. What was it her therapist had told her? Fuck her therapist. He was a hot dude, she should fuck him.

She also wanted to fuck Kristen and… NO! Just friends, nothing more. Grow the hell up.

She was running out of time. She cleaned the sink and sat down on the floor, trying to collect her thoughts.

Idina sat on the floor until her phone rang. She picked it up.

“Dee,” Kristen said, “I don’t think I’m at the right place I don’t see you anywhere.”

Idina froze. What was she supposed to do now? She squeaked out an incomprehensible phrase, prompting worry from the other end of the line.

“I’m okay Kris, I’m sorry I just lost track of time,” Idina said calmly, somehow finding composure. Idina Menzel knew how to put on an act. Falling apart and being a mess was a part of that act. Laughing it off even when it hurt. “Yeah, I just slipped and dove headfirst into my door,” she chuckled. “I’m fine, I promise, no blackouts. I promise I’ll be there soon, okay?”

“Okay,” Kristen replied, but she sounded nervous.

* * *

Idina quickly dashed across the busy street, using her scarf to cover her face. She made it to the coffee shop and found the short blonde sitting nervously in a corner, twiddling her thumbs.

“Dee!” she whispered in exclamation, jumping up and hugging her. “I wasn’t sure you would show up!”

Idina grunted as the force of the blonde hit her, taking a few steps backwards to balance herself. She hugged Kristen back and the blonde sighed and squeezed her tighter. Idina felt better. She nuzzled Kristen, a smile slowly growing on her lips.

“Let’s sit down,” Kristen said. “I ordered you some peppermint tea since I wasn’t sure what you like for coffee I hope that’s okay, you said you liked it once.”

“That’s perfect Kris,” Idina said as she took her coat off and hanging it on the booth, giving them move cover from the door. She sat down and the tension grew. “So, you wanted to talk.”

“Yeah,” Kirsten replied, her hands folded in her lap; she was staring at them. “I, well, I’ve been thinking a lot about what happened a few weeks ago, and I hope I didn’t scare you off.”

“You haven’t,” the brunette reassured.

“And I’m not divorcing Dax _because_ of you, you just helped me see what I was seeing all along and saved me a lot of heartaches, so please don’t feel bad about that.” She paused for a minute. Idina said nothing. She looked away instead. “So,” Kristen continued when she realized Idina was not going to say anything. “About a few weeks ago, I don’t want you to think I was taking advantage of you. You were in a venerable state and I should have set boundaries and I didn’t and I am very, very sorry if, no, for the lines that I crossed. I hope that you can forgive me and I want to rekindle whatever friendship we had and—”

“Kris,” Idina said, stopping her in her tracks. Kristen froze. Idina’s eyes were glassy and she was nervously digging her thumb into her palm. “If anyone was out of line it was me,” she said. So Kristen didn’t feel the same way. Or not the way Idina felt. She couldn’t keep it in, she started crying.

The blonde came around the table and sat beside her. “Oh, honey, what’s wrong?” Kristen asked hugging Idina.

“I’m sorry, it’s nothing,” Idina started. She hugged Kristen back and cried into her shoulder. She had spent all this time building the two of them up, thinking they could have been something and Kristen was telling her it was all a mistake and a misunderstanding. “Actually,” she said, sitting up. She wiped her eyes. She was going to up for what she wanted. “I’m very certain I like you, Kristen,” she replied. The blonde looked at her in confusion. “and maybe I was jumping the gun thinking we had more, but I’m saying it now since we’re being honest: I want to take you on a date.”

Their shoulder was still touching but there could have been an ocean in between them at that moment.

“I want to date you too,” Kristen said, breaking the silence.

“Then why did you say all that stuff before?” Idina asked

“I was worried you didn’t feel the same way.”

“I do,” she reassured. “And from now in I want you to be honest to me, no matter what you think I think, and I promise to do the same. Kristen Bell, will you be my girlfriend?” Idina asked, her smile growing.

“Yes!” she squeaked, nodding in excitement. She flung hers let at Idina, her. They both giggled as Idina fell backwards on the booth and Kristen pressed her lips against hers.

They made out. Brushing her teeth had been a good idea. Idina felt sparks like she had not in a while, butterflies in her stomach and all. She ran her hands through Kristen’s hair, letting herself be kissed senseless.

“I’m not an easy person to love,” Idina admitted as they sat back up. “I’m neurotic at times and I won’t hesitate to throw you into traffic to keep Walker safe. I am also going to do something at some point that will make you lose your shit. But if you’re willing to give this a go, I am too.”

“I am, Dee,” Kristen reassured. “And I know I can be a bit of a pain too. I am going to drag you to relationship counselling and trust me, I have more energy than you think. But I am willing to give us a shot if you are,” Kristen finished, taking Idina’s hand in hers.

They both smiled, blushing.

“I think we have something special,” the blonde continued. “I don’t think natural on-screen chemistry comes like that without there being something between us as well. We’ll have something special if we both work for it.”

“Me too,” Idina replied, grinning. “I’m ready.”


End file.
